Daily Disasters
by Concave Patterns
Summary: Darcy's week is shaping up to be one great big bag of suck, much to the delight of a certain God of Mischief. Post-Avengers.
1. Chapter 1

My first Tasertricks fic! No guarantee when updates will happen because I had no plans to start a new fic, much less one in a fandom I've never written for. Ideally this will be 5 chapters, following Darcy from Monday to Friday. Enjoy!

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Monday

Darcy strolled into the S.H.I.E.L.D. lab at 9 a.m. nursing a steaming cup of coffee.

"Hey boss lady," she greeted Jane, plopping a brown paper bag onto the astrophysicist's desk, "brought you a carrot muffin. Eat up - you can't science on an empty stomach."

Jane looked up from her research with big, bewildered eyes as if she'd forgotten where she was. When she saw Darcy she relaxed and gave a small embarrassed smile. "Oh, hi Darcy. Thanks for that. I kind of forgot to eat breakfast."

"Yeah, I knew you would." Darcy grinned and set her coffee down on her own desk before removing her gloves and shrugging out of her pea coat. It was late March, but the New York air was still pretty brisk in the morning.

She settled into her chair and booted up her computer but the monitor stubbornly remained black.

Darcy frowned and tapped the keyboard, trying to wake up the screen. When that didn't work, she wiggled the mouse. No dice.

"Balls" she muttered, pushing her chair back and dropping down onto her knees to crawl under the desk. Thank God she wore pants today instead of a skirt.

At least a dozen different black cords were tangled into an impossible ball leading to the electrical outlet. Darcy rolled her eyes before starting to randomly unplug stuff and then plug it back in.

"My my, Miss Lewis." A low voice drawled from behind her, making Darcy freeze. "At the very least, can you not _attempt_ to be a lady?"

Darcy grit her teeth and replied sweetly, "Well I would if you would be a gentleman and kindly remove your eyeballs from my ass."

She heard a soft chuckle before she let out a squeak as a hand unexpectedly grasped her around the waist and pulled her out from under the desk.

Darcy stood on shaky legs and faced Loki.

"Gee, thanks." She made sure that her words were positively dripping with sarcasm.

"The pleasure is all mine." Loki flashed her a wicked smile before stepping over to Jane's desk.

Darcy took a moment to stare at his retreating form. Really, it was only fair that she should get to check out his ass after he had blatantly been looking at hers.

The reluctant research assistant was already deep in conversation with Jane. Darcy could pick out a few words but mostly it was scientific jibber-jabber that made no sense to her.

Loki had been working in the lab with Jane and Darcy for four months now. Given the option of either sitting in one of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s underground holding cells for an indeterminate amount of time or putting his knowledge of the Bifrost to use by helping Jane, Loki had begrudgingly chosen the latter.

Thor was off playing peacekeeper in the other realms, trying to repair the damage Loki had caused. He would return for his brother at some point so Loki could be taken to Asgard for a proper trial. In the meantime, Loki put in hours at the lab and, in exchange, Director Fury would give Thor a good report to take back to Odin in the hopes that it would lighten Loki's sentence. The whole thing had been Thor's idea and frankly, Darcy was surprised that Fury had even agreed to it. He was one badass mofo and it didn't seem like he was the forgiving type but Darcy figured that when you've got a giant, burly blonde Asgardian prince asking for help, it can't hurt to say yes and have that favour in your back pocket.

Turning her attention back to her computer, Darcy tried the monitor again. When it lit up displaying the log-in screen, she let out a triumphant whoop.

After a few hours of inputting Jane's new data and doing a little online shopping (_hello_ _S.H.I.E.L.D. paycheck!_) Darcy stood and stretched her back.

"I'm doing a lunch run," she announced.

Jane barely looked up from her papers while Loki was sprawled out in a chair in the corner, flipping through one of Jane's textbooks. His eyes lifted a fraction when he heard her voice.

"You want anything, Space Cadet?" She asked, addressing Loki.

"I do not care for your Midgardian food." Loki answered in a bored tone. He flipped the page of his book but Darcy could feel that his eyes were still on her instead of the page.

"Whatevs. I'm bringing you both sandwiches!" She called, breezing out of the lab. It was hard to resist the urge to look over her shoulder and see if Loki was still watching her.

Over the last few months, she and Loki had developed a strange kind of...companionship. To say they were friends wasn't quite accurate since all their conversations involved a whole lot of snarky remarks and/or flirting, much to Darcy's delight. She considered herself somewhat of a pro when it came to dishing out snark and it was fun to have someone else in the lab with a sharp tongue. Usually her comments went completely ignored by Jane. As for the flirty-flirt...well, what could she say. The guy was _hot_.

Humming to herself, Darcy entered the cafeteria and snagged three pre-packaged turkey sandwiches from the food cooler before getting a coffee refill for herself. As an afterthought, she filled a second paper cup with coffee for Jane. Most days, sugar and caffeine seemed to be all that kept the scientist going. Well, that and the desire to make contact with the home of her super sexy godly boyfriend, Darcy mused.

After paying for the food, she made her way back to the lab with a coffee in each hand and the sandwiches balanced in the crook of her arms.

"I totally got this." Darcy said aloud to the empty hallway. She rounded the corner and took one step into the lab just as a man was leaving. Darcy recognized him as Tim, one of the meteorologists who worked one floor below them. Sometimes he stopped by to swap data with Jane about the atmosphere and weather patterns.

Tim's shoulder knocked against hers as he squeezed past where Darcy stood in the doorway. The rest seemed to happen in slow motion for Darcy. In hindsight, she should have just let the sandwiches fall. They were plastic wrapped and the S.H.I.E.L.D. facility was always spotless. In fact, the floors were probably cleaner than most of the dishes in Darcy's cupboards.

But noooo, she had to try to save her little balancing act of coffee and sandwiches, twisting her arm too far forward and spilling the entire contents of one cup down the front of her pretty wine colored blouse.

"Son of a bitch!" Darcy exclaimed, pissed that her favorite work shirt was ruined. Then the heat of the coffee set in and her chest started burning_._ "Son of a _bitch_!" She shrieked louder this time. "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!"

Loki was scribbling equations on a white board but at the sound of Darcy's outburst he dropped the marker and calmly approached her, taking the second coffee from her hand before she burned herself again.

"Are you in pain, Darcy?" He asked, a slight smile tugging at his lips.

"What do you think, brainiac?" Darcy hissed, kicking one of the fallen sandwiches out of her way so she could walk to her desk and grab some tissues. "Fuck me gently, that hurts." She grumbled as she blotted the hot liquid off her shirt.

Beside her, she heard Loki make a short, strangled noise. Darcy whipped her head towards him angrily, "Are you _laughing _at me?"

"I would never do such a thing." He answered sincerely, clasping his hands behind his back and shifting his weight forward onto his toes. His eyes were practically shining with glee.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?" She narrowed her eyes at him, but it was hard to stay angry when his face looked so full of delight. Masochistic asshole.

"Do you need some help with that?" He gestured to her ruined blouse.

Darcy snorted, "Yeah, no thanks perv."

"With the burn, I mean." Loki stepped closer and with a flick of his fingers, he easily unbuttoned the top two closures of her shirt.

The room suddenly felt 40 degrees warmer to Darcy, and it wasn't from the piping hot coffee on her skin. She stood there, open mouthed, as Loki undid a third button. She was both relieved and disappointed when he stopped there.

"Allow me to heal it." He murmured, eyes roaming over her from throat to breasts.

"Um," Darcy cleared her throat and desperately tried to force her hormones to _calm the fuck down_. "I thought you lost your magical juju stuff when you were sent here." When Thor had first brought Loki into the S.H.I.E.L.D. facility, he had explained that for their safety, Loki had been coerced into wearing a charmed necklace that put the kibosh on his abilities.

"Ah, I am merely limited in what I can do. My fath-Odin," he corrected, "ensured that I would be able to call upon my magic if a worthy need arose and my intentions were pure."

"Oh...so like, it works if you want to heal or protect someone." Darcy nodded in approval, "Smart." Judging from the way he was ogling her chest, she seriously doubted that Loki's intentions were completely pure at the moment, but Darcy was surprisingly okay with that.

Loki was watching her intently and Darcy then realized that he was still waiting on an answer to his question.

"Yes," she said quickly before her brain could tell her that this was a _very bad idea_. "Can you heal it? Please?" She bit her lip for extra sad puppy dog effect.

Loki's eyes visibly darkened. He took another step closer so they were toe-to-toe and Darcy could feel every one of his warm exhales of breath dance across her skin. It was so intimate that she had completely forgotten that Jane was in the room with them.

Jane!

Mortified, Darcy peeked around Loki's shoulder and let out a relieved sigh when she saw Jane fully absorbed in her work, tinkering with one of her homemade science doodads.

"She will pay us no attention," Loki assured her, seeming to realize what Darcy's sudden panic had been about, "but we can go elsewhere if you are uncomfortable." He looked genuinely concerned, tilting his head in a way that was far too adorable for Darcy's lady parts to handle.

"Nope. Nope, nope, nope." Darcy replied quickly, "We stay here." Even though Jane was lost in her work, she was still in the room and Darcy needed her there. If she was left alone with Loki at that moment, she would be tearing his shirt off before you could even say 'sexytimes'.

"Very well." Loki raised his hand to her chest then hesitated, his fingers hovering with uncertainly just above her skin, "May I?"

Sweet baby Jesus, he was asking permission. Darcy nodded, not trusting her voice.

His hand was surprisingly warm as he laid his palm against her sternum, fingers splaying out towards her collarbone. Through the haze of heat and skin-tingling awesomeness, Darcy wondered if he could feel her heart hammering wildly. She certainly could. It felt like she'd just run a marathon.

Loki's eyes caught hers and he smiled slowly, his eyes crinkling around the edges.

Oh, he knew.

She was so screwed.

Darcy opened her mouth to say something rude (she _desperately_ needed to break the sexual tension before she did something bad, like kiss him) but then coolness started to spread over her chest, like a thousand little snowflakes tickling her skin as they landed.

"Oooh," she breathed with an involuntary shiver.

Suddenly, the combination of cold and heat and heaviness of Loki's hand was gone. Darcy tried not to look too disappointed as his long fingers lifted from her skin and proceeded to button her shirt back up.

"Better?" His voice was deep and husky, "I am afraid I cannot remove the stain though." He traced the edge of the big brown patch on her shirt.

"That's...that's okay," Darcy replied, trying to look anywhere but at him, "I keep a hoodie here for when the A/C gets out of control. I'll just go change."

She scampered past him on wobbly legs, snatching her black hoodie off the back of her chair before practically running to the bathroom.

After Darcy composed herself and emerged from the washroom a few minutes later, she found Jane putting a big, haphazard stack of papers on her desk next to Darcy's computer. Loki was nowhere to be found.

"Darcy, there you are!" Jane said, "I know it's getting late, but I really need you to input all this data before you leave so I can calibrate the spectro-analyzer first thing tomorrow morning."

Darcy plopped down into her chair, groaning internally. Fucking Loki and his stupid sexiness distracting her from work. Jane looked so hopeful and excited about her research that there was no way Darcy could say no. Plus, she kinda owed Jane big-time for hooking her up with this job in the first place. "No prob."

"Thanks Darce." Jane beamed, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "I think I've really been making progress in the last month. It's so exciting, can you imagine the possibilities of having our own version of the Bifrost here on Earth? To be able to contact Asgard any time we needed?"

"Yeah, like intergalactic booty calls for you and Thor." Darcy offered with a wide, innocent smile.

"Darcy!" Jane squeaked, her cheeks turning pink, "I was speaking from a scientific perspective."

"Yeah, the science of _biology_." Darcy raised her eyebrows suggestively.

Jane laughed and retreated to her desk, "Back to work! There's a lot to do."

Darcy side-eyed the gigantic stack of papers sitting beside her. It definitely looked like she'd be working late, and on a Monday to boot.

Just perfect.

She started typing Jane's calculations into the proper software program, hoping she could burn through the work quickly and maybe get back to her apartment in time to enjoy a grilled cheese sandwich and a little trashy television before bed.

As least her whole week couldn't be this bad, right?


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for all the reviews, faves and follows so far :)

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Tuesday

Light filtered through a gap in Darcy's bedroom curtains and hit her square in the face. She groaned and burrowed further under the blankets, squeezing her eyes shut.

God, why was it so bright out? It could have only been 5 or 6 am, since her alarm hadn't even gone off yet.

With an exaggerated sigh, Darcy flipped over and squinted at the numbers on her alarm clock. 8:28? That didn't make sense. She fumbled for her glasses on the nightstand next to her, shoving them on her face and scooting closer to the edge of the bed for a close-up view of the time.

"Crap, crap, crappity crapballs!" Darcy kicked the tangled blankets away from her legs and bolted out of bed. It was almost 8:30! Why hadn't her alarm gone off?

She ran into the bathroom, quickly stripping down and taking the fastest shower of her life. If she skipped breakfast and her makeup routine, she could still make it to work on time.

After dressing quickly in the same pants as yesterday (because she was in a rush, and totally not because Loki had been eyeing her butt in them), she grabbed her hair dryer and tried to speedily dry her hair by bending over and letting the wet mass fall forward over her face.

"C'mon, c'mon..." Darcy muttered, raking her fingers through the still damp tresses. "Meh, good enough." It wouldn't be her best hair day, but that was nothing her favourite beanie couldn't fix.

She lowered the arm holding her hair dryer and was rewarded with a sharp tug at her scalp.

Dread slowly seeped into her as Darcy moved her arm again only to feel her hair pull painfully. Reaching up with her empty hand, she followed the strands of hair until her fingers reached a big frizzy knot wound into the nozzle of the dryer. Oh yeah, it was stuck good.

"Nooooo..." she whined out loud, "I do _not_ have time for this!"

After a few minutes of unsuccessfully trying to pull her hair loose, she noticed her manicure kit sitting open on the countertop, complete with a little pair of silver scissors.

She grabbed them quickly and without thought, but then she continued to just stand there, awkwardly bent at the waist, as she tried to psych herself up for what she was about to do.

"It's just hair. It'll grow back. Man up, Darcy." She told herself.

With one last deep breath, she started snipping.

* * *

When Darcy entered the lab, it was 8:59 and she was feeling pretty proud about that.

"The on-time streak continues!" She announced, pumping her fist in the air.

"Just barely." Loki said dryly, looking up from the thick textbook he held. "Are you going to get rid of that?"

"Good morning to you, too." Darcy said sarcastically as she fired up her computer. "Get rid of what?"

"That abomination on your head." Loki responded, eyeing her with thinly veiled disgust. Darcy had removed her coat and gloves but her hat firmly stayed put on her head.

"Hey! I love this hat." Darcy reached up and touched her knitted beanie, stroking it soothingly, "It's ok baby. He didn't mean it."

"And now you speak to it?" Loki blinked at her before burying his nose back in his book, "Strange girl. I will never understand you."

"It's part of my charm," Darcy quipped, flashing him a wide smile.

"Charming indeed." Loki muttered into his book.

Darcy sighed, "Look dude, it's been a rough week so just let me wear my hat in peace."

"A rough week?" Loki echoed, "Darcy, you realize that it is only 9 o'clock on a Tuesday."

"Thanks for the update, father time. And yes, it's a rough week. I had to stay late last night inputting data after that coffee fiasco-"

Loki raised his eyes at that, smirking at Darcy wickedly.

She tried to ignore him (and the sudden memory of his hand on her chest) as she continued her rant, "and for some stupid reason my alarm clock didn't go off this morning and my poor hair-" Darcy stopped abruptly, realizing that it was probably a bad idea to mention her hair troubles. That was perfect teasing ammunition that she would absolutely not give to Loki.

"Your hair?" At that, Loki snapped his book shut and set it aside as he slowly approached Darcy. "Is that why you wear that ridiculous hat?"

Aw, shit. She had baited him and now he was very, very curious.

"Let me see." Loki demanded, leaning in and bracing his elbows on Darcy's desk as he studied her inquisitively.

Darcy shook her head so hard that her glasses slid down her nose. "Nuh-uh. Not a chance. I will wear this hat to my grave." She declared overdramatically.

A slow, mischievous grin spread across Loki's face. "Ah, I see. So how about a little wager, Miss Lewis? I bet I can rid you of that hat by the day's end."

"Really?" Darcy met Loki's challenging grin with one of her own, "What's in it for me?" She loved a good competition and beating the God of Mischief would feel really, really satisfying.

"If you win, I will do your bidding for the remainder of the week." Loki offered.

"Ooooh, my own lab bitch! You will fetch me coffee and rub my feet." Darcy rubbed her hands together, delighted by the idea.

"Only should you win." Loki reminded her, "But if I am successful, you must kneel for me." The look he gave her was positively devilish.

"Oh hell no! That whole 'you were made to be ruled' ship has sailed, buddy." Darcy crossed her arms, adding to her look of annoyance.

"Then don't lose." Loki retorted, "Unless you are too afraid to place a bet with a god. In that case, it appears that I may have overestimated your boldness. Such a shame, I was beginning to find you refreshingly different from the rest of you weak and spineless Midgardians."

"Aaahhh," Darcy let out an aggravated exhale as she slumped forward in defeat. He knew exactly how to play her. "I am bold as fuck, thank you very much. I think I proved that point the night I tased Thor and he dropped like a sack of potatoes."

Loki's lips quirked up at that. When Darcy had first told him the story of the night she, Jane and Erik came across Thor, Loki had laughed for five minutes straight before wiping his eyes and looking at Darcy appreciatively. "Well played, Miss Lewis" he had said, making goosebumps break out all over Darcy's skin from the way her surname rolled off his tongue.

Darcy pushed the memory away and stuck out her hand to Loki. "You've got yourself a deal." They shook, and the bet was sealed.

All morning, Darcy tried her best to avoid coming within five feet of Loki so he couldn't snatch the hat off her head. Childish, yes, but she would do whatever it took to win their bet.

Thanks to him, she was also jumpy and overly suspicious of every little task Jane asked of her. Darcy was beginning to think that making a bet with a bonafide trickster hadn't been one of her brightest moments. Maybe his plan was just to wait her out until she stressed herself to death. At this rate, it would happen sooner rather than later.

As Darcy stared at Loki wondering when he'd make his move, he happened to look up at her from his place across the room. Darcy glared fire at him with narrowed eyes and he smiled back innocently. That little shit.

"Whatever you two are doing, cut it out." Jane spoke up, interrupting their silent staring contest, "Darcy, I need you to come over here and help with this." She pointed to a large metal contraption that sat precariously on Jane's workspace. "When I turn it on, the output of energy is going to make it move, so you and Loki hold it steady while I record the readings."

Darcy reluctantly left her chair and approached Jane's desk, standing as far from the device (and Loki) as possible.

"Oh c'mon Darce, it won't bite. Just hold onto it. If this thing flies off the table and breaks, it will set us back weeks in research." Jane prodded her closer, poking at Darcy's back with her finger.

"Okayyyy..." Darcy edged closer to the table and wrapped her hands firmly around two of the thin metal legs supporting Jane's device. She looked up and found Loki standing opposite her, his hands around the other two legs.

"Hello Darcy," he purred in a deep, smooth voice, "It seems as if I've barely seen you today. You wouldn't happen to be avoiding me now, would you?"

"Oh, I'm absolutely avoiding you." Darcy replied easily, deciding to play the truth card and catch him off guard.

It worked for a second. Loki's eyes slightly widened and his mouth went slack with surprise, but then it was instantly replaced with his usual smug look.

"Darcy, Loki, are you two ready?" Jane called, hand poised over a large black knob that Darcy assumed powered whatever this thing was.

"This isn't gonna kill me, is it?" Darcy asked, "Cause I have a certain bet I'm going to win in a couple hours and it would totally suck to die before I get to collect on it."

She heard Loki scoff at her comment before Jane turned the dial, bringing the machine to life slowly.

"Huh, this isn't so bad." Darcy commented. The machine was definitely shaking but it was pretty weak, like a cell phone on vibrate.

"That's because it's only at 4 percent power." Jane said, giving the knob another twist. "Increasing to 20 percent!"

The vibrations went from cell phone to jackhammer and Darcy felt her insides quaking from the force. She looked up at Loki, gauging his reaction. His brow was furrowed in concentration, like he was doing complicated math equations in his head. Darcy didn't find that comforting.

"Um, Jane? Is this supposed to be happening?" Darcy called out, her voice raising slightly in panic. The whole desk was shaking now, causing Jane's empty coffee mug and a container of pens to topple over.

"Turn it off." Loki finally spoke up, his voice loud and commanding. "The calculations are wrong. Turn if off now before you set off an earthquake and level this entire facility."

Jane swore and started hitting buttons and switches, trying to stop the machine. Across the lab, one of the glass window panes cracked.

"Oh my God," Darcy cried, "I am gonna die! I still had so much to do! I never got to see Asgard, or the Eiffel Tower...or you naked." She spoke the last part to Loki.

"Really?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Meh, if I'm gonna die I might as well put it all out there." Darcy shrugged as much as she could manage while still tightly gripping the malfunctioning machine in front of them.

The overhead lights exploded with a loud _pop_ raining down shards of glass and plunging the lab into darkness.

Darcy couldn't stop the low whine of fear that escaped her throat. In the darkness, Loki's hand found hers, gripping it tightly while their other hands tried in vain to steady Jane's device.

"Darcy," Loki had to almost shout over the noise of the rattling lab, "If it is any consolation, I too would have the same regret."

It took Darcy a minute to decipher his words but when she did, her pulse spiked with exhilaration instead of fear. Holy fuckballs, Loki liked her just as much as she liked him.

She was a minute away from letting go of the machine in favour of launching herself at Loki and spending her last living moments making out with a god, but then the shaking stopped.

"It's turned off!" Jane called out wearily from somewhere in the dark room. "Is everyone okay?"

Darcy let out a shaky exhale and released her death grip on the machine, grimacing in pain as she stretched out her stiff fingers. "Yeah, we're good. You alright, boss lady?"

"Fine, fine." Jane answered distractedly, "I just don't understand how the field codes could have been off...I did the math three times..."

"Jane," Darcy interrupted the scientist's muttering, "how about you find us a maintenance guy to replace the lights and get rid of all this glass. You can't fix your codes when you can't even see your hand in front of your face."

"Right, the lights. I'll be right back!" Darcy heard Jane fumble her way through the dim room, shoes crunching on broken glass as she made her way to the door.

Once Jane was gone, Darcy turned back to Loki. He still held her hand and used it to pull her closer so Darcy was chest to chest with him. She could just make out the whites of his eyes and was _really, really_ wishing for more light so she could fully see his face right now.

"Darcy..." he drew out her name, making her shiver.

"Yes?" Darcy licked her lips, inching just a little closer. He smelled like soap and mint and it was making her dizzy.

Loki leaned in. His warm breath tickled her cheek and his lips brushed her ear as he spoke in a low tone, "I win".

"Hmm?" Darcy hummed, too caught up in his smell and body heat to really pay attention. Then her eyes snapped wide open and she pulled her hand free of Loki's so she could reach up and check her head.

Sure enough, her hat was gone.

"You fucker." Darcy fumed, swinging her arm blindly in the dark as she tried to punch him. She missed, and Loki's deep chuckle just served to make her angrier.

"I look forward to collecting on our wager." He said, sounding far too pleased with himself, "Not now, of course. I would not want you to damage those lovely legs of yours by kneeling on a floor of broken glass."

"Gee, how considerate of you." Darcy huffed, sagging against the desk once all the fight had left her. She perked up a bit when she heard voices at the door of the lab.

Jane appeared, holding a battery powered lantern that lit the room enough to give Darcy a decent view of just how much damage had been done. Along with the shattered lights and cracked window, it looked like some of the ceiling tiles had fallen, littering the floor with dust and rubble. It sure wasn't pretty.

"Guys, this is Jason from maintenance." Jane gestured to the man next to her wearing blue coveralls with the S.H.I.E.L.D. logo sewn on the pocket. "He's going to clean up here. Since there's not much else we can do today, you're free to go home, Darce. Loki, I guess you can go back to your living quarters."

"Don't have to tell me twice." Darcy carefully stepped over a particularly nasty shard of glass and retrieved her purse and coat from her desk.

She, Jane and Loki walked out of the lab together in companionable silence, heading towards the elevators at the end of the hall. It was the ring of Jane's cell phone that finally broke the quiet.

"Hello? Yes..." Jane was looking increasingly worried with each passing second, "Okay. I'll be right up." She ended call and sighed loudly.

"Who was that?" Darcy asked, curious since there weren't many people who truly intimidated Jane.

"Agent Hill." Jane replied, fiddling with her phone nervously. "Apparently Director Fury has already heard about our little lab accident and wants a full report from me right now."

"You'll do fine." Darcy assured her as Jane entered the elevator looking like she was about to pee her pants out of nervousness. "I'm sure he won't go too hard on you – you're his favourite astrophysicist!"

"Darcy, I'm S.H.I.E.L.D.'s _only_ astrophysicist!" Jane called back worriedly as the door started to slide shut on her.

"Go Janey!" Darcy patted the closed door and then turned to Loki, "Soooo...Guess I'll see you tomorrow?"

Loki nodded, "Until tomorrow, Darcy." He began walking away then stopped and turned to face her. "I almost forgot. This belongs to you." He pulled her beanie out of his back pocket. Darcy tried not to stare but only mildly succeeded.

While staying at S.H.I.E.L.D., Loki had unwillingly traded in his heavy Asgardian leathers for regular men's dress pants and button-up shirts, which Darcy heartily approved of. The way those pants fit...Darcy had to stop that train of thought before she started drooling onto the floor.

Loki held out the hat and Darcy quickly snatched it from his hand, hugging it to her chest. "Aww! You're giving it back to me? For real? I figured you already burned it or cut it up into a hundred pieces."

Loki lifted his shoulders in a shrug, "You obviously love that piece of rubbish. Far be it from me to keep a lady from her most treasured possession."

"Thanks." Darcy beamed up at him, shoving her hat into her coat pocket. "Hey Loki, about what happened back in the lab..." Her face grew serious as she paused, deciding how to word her question, "Did you know we would be okay? I mean, you didn't use your magic to stop the quake so did you know we weren't in any real danger?"

"Why do you ask?" Loki asked somewhat warily.

"I guess what I'm wondering is...did you mean what you said about me?" She finished in one big rush of breath.

Loki was silent for a long time and with each passing second Darcy could feel her face turning redder and redder with embarrassment. She was just about to turn and leave when his soft response stopped her.

"Yes."

Darcy held her breath, waiting for him to continue.

"I knew Dr. Foster would turn off the machine in time." Loki spoke slowly, as if he were choosing his words carefully, "As for your other question, it was my intention to distract you long enough for me to win our bet, but that does not mean my confession was untrue."

"Wow, so um...just to summarize, I wanna see you naked and you wanna see me naked." This was one incredibly awkward conversation Darcy never thought she'd be having.

"You are correct." Loki was trying to look serious but Darcy could see his lips twitching with humor.

"Okay. Glad that's settled." She nodded approvingly, trying to play it cool even though her stomach was doing cartwheels and she wanted to run home and squee into her pillow like a 12 year old girl.

"Darcy?" Loki was looking at her with an unreadable expression on his face. He stepped closer, taking a piece of her hair between his thumb and forefinger and tugging it lightly.

"Uhh, yea?" She responded unintelligibly. He was so close that Darcy could see the little flecks of blue in his eyes. It was kind of mesmerizing.

"The next time you wish to cut your hair, I advise that you seek out a professional. I do believe that this is even more unflattering than that absurd hat." His eyes flashed with amusement before he stepped back and strolled down the hall.

Darcy glared daggers at his retreating form. That was the second time today that she had gone from wanting to kiss him to envisioning herself strangling him in the span of 0.2 seconds. It was starting to make her question her sanity, and to top it all off, this was only Tuesday.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for all the great reviews so far! I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint. I'm also super excited to announce that I'm going to my first ever comic-con next weekend! A solid day of fangirling over all things Marvel. It will be heaven :)

* * *

Wednesday

Wednesday morning found Darcy entering the S.H.I.E.L.D. lab utterly and completely soaking wet.

"What happened to you?" Jane looked up from her research upon hearing Darcy enter the room with a loud _squish-squash _of her sopping wet shoes.

"Some blind asshat drove through a puddle at a thousand miles an hour and splashed me." Darcy dropped into her chair, fuming with anger.

"Wow, they sure got you good." Jane looked on in sympathy while Darcy dried the lenses of her glasses with an old Starbucks napkin she'd found in her desk drawer.

"Tell me about it." Darcy muttered, shrugging off her wet coat and letting it hang over the back of her chair where it dripped a steady puddle onto the floor.

"You know, you'll freeze in here if you wear those wet clothes all day," Jane observed, "I'm pretty sure there's a lost and found box in the front lobby. You should borrow some dry clothes from it."

"Yeah," Darcy frowned and shifted uncomfortably in her seat, "these wet skinny jeans are getting all kinds of personal with me. Like, at least buy me a drink first. Right?"

She got no answer from Jane as the astrophysicist had already retreated back into her sciency la-la land.

Darcy lifted herself from the now wet seat of her chair and shuffled to the door, making a face as the wet denim of her jeans remained plastered to her skin in all the wrong places.

"Yuck." She muttered, walking awkwardly down the hall until she reached the elevators. From there, she went up two floors to the main level which looked like an average, nondescript office building with its shiny tile floors and a small waiting area of chairs and outdated golf magazines.

Darcy approached the reception desk and leaned her elbow on it casually.

"Heyyy..." Darcy eyed the name badge of the middle-aged woman behind the desk, "Irene. How's it hangin?"

Irene was clearly not amused. She gave Darcy a look that said "I ain't got time for your shit" that reminded Darcy quite a lot of Fury. Maybe he taught it to all the receptionists. Maybe he hosted seminars! She would totally sign up for that class.

Getting back on topic, Darcy asked Irene about the lost and found box and was promptly handed a large plastic bin full of some of the most random crap Darcy had ever seen.

She sorted through socks (barf), broken sunglasses (lame), a small keychain version of Mjolnir (Myeuh-Myeuh! She kind of wanted to take that for herself), then finally came across a navy blue t-shirt and some women's track pants.

By the time Darcy arrived back at the lab freshly clothed, Loki was there.

She greeted him with a "hey" but he didn't even look up from the notebook he was scribbling in.

"_Prince_ my ass. I thought royalty were supposed to have manners." Darcy muttered to herself, wandering back over to her desk. She organized Jane's latest paperwork into a nice neat stack before starting to type it up. After about an hour of inputting Jane's data, Loki called out her name.

"Darcy, would you fetch last week's results..." his voice trailed off, making Darcy look up from her work.

Loki had a strange expression on his face and his lips were set in a firm, thin line as he stared at her.

Scratch that, he was staring at her boobs.

"What?" Darcy asked, "Did I spill coffee on myself or are you just being creepy?"

"What are you wearing?" He asked, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"Um...clothing, like I do every day." Darcy cocked her head to the side as she studied him. "What's up with you? You're being even weirder than usual."

Loki continued to stare. The hardened look in his eyes was making Darcy feel incredibly self-conscious. Finally she looked down at her shirt, trying to figure out what was making him act so strange. As she studied the red and white star-spangled design, realization hit her like a freight train.

"Oh my god! Loki, are you jealous because I'm wearing a Captain America t-shirt?" Darcy asked, not able to hold back the giant grin that spread across her lips.

Loki scowled and lowered his head, staring at his notebook. "No." He muttered unconvincingly.

"You totally are! Awwww!" Darcy cooed at him.

"No not speak to me like that. I am not an infant to be fawned over." Loki squirmed in his seat, looking agitated and uncomfortable. He refused to even glance in Darcy's direction.

"Relax dude, I think it's kinda sweet actually." She could have sworn she saw his neck flush pink in response to her comment. Darcy went back to typing, grinning down at her keyboard. Embarrassed Loki was too damn cute.

Shortly before lunch, Jane left for her monthly meeting with S.H.I.E.L.D.'s big wigs to discuss the progress of their Bifrost project. Through some miracle, Jane had scored herself a Level 5 security pass, but since Darcy barely qualified for her Level 1 badge, she was left behind to babysit the cranky god sitting across from her.

"Please tell me you aren't still upset about me calling you jealous." Darcy rolled her eyes at Loki who had been unnaturally quiet with her all morning.

Loki didn't answer; he just continued writing notes while wearing a permanent frown on his face.

"Really, the silent treatment? You big baby." Darcy huffed, scooting her chair closer to him so she could poke him in the shoulder.

"Loki." Poke.

"Loki." Poke.

"Looooookiiiiii..."

"For the love of Yggdrasil - stop that, woman!" Loki grabbed Darcy's hand before she could pull it away. "Do not make me break these." He warned, squeezing her fingers before letting go.

"Geez, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today." Darcy commented, shaking out her hand even though he hadn't actually hurt her.

"More like the wrong realm." Loki grumbled.

"Alright," Darcy leaned over and swatted Loki's notebook clear off the desk. She heard it land in the corner with a soft _thunk_. "No distractions. Talk."

Surprised, Loki blinked down at the desk where his notes had been. "Did you just...?"

"Yep," Darcy confirmed, "now talk to me. Please?"

Loki sighed and ran a hand over his face. "You swear on your honor that what I am about to say will not leave this room." He demanded, finally looking at Darcy.

She nodded eagerly, "Absolutely."

Loki hesitated, "I find it quite displeasing to see you in that garment." He finally admitted, looking mildly unsettled by his confession.

Darcy wasn't the type to get overly emotional but Loki's admission had her practically melting into a pile of goo. She really wanted to give him a hug but Loki would probably push her off and make some snide comment about her mortal germs, so instead Darcy settled for resting her hand gently on his forearm.

"Oh, Loki. Steve's a cool guy but I barely even know him, and I'm definitely not interested in him as anything more than a friend." Darcy couldn't believe she was actually placating a jealous god right now. Her life just kept getting weirder. "I got splashed by a car on my way to work so I grabbed a new shirt from the lost and found. This isn't even mine."

At that, Loki perked up a bit. "You were splashed by a car?" He enquired, looking happier than he's been all morning.

"Of course that's what cheers you up." Darcy rolled her eyes. "This shirt really upsets you that much, huh?"

Darcy could see Loki's jaw tick as he considered her question. "Darcy, you must understand that I am not one to speak my feelings. This is difficult for me." A pained expression crossed his face, "Over these past months I have come to enjoy your company. You are unlike any Midgardian I have ever encountered. Seeing you in that..." he gestured to her shirt, "I was surprised to find that it sparked my jealousy. It appears that I am truly following in Thor's footsteps." He laughed humorlessly. "Cast out from Asgard only to grow weak at the hands of a mortal woman."

"Wow, I think you just managed to compliment me and insult me at the same time." Darcy observed. "You know, if you just quit being so prejudiced against us '_lowly Midgardians'_" she added air quotes to that, "most of your problems would be solved. I mean, you don't see me getting all upset about liking you even though you're a Frost Giant."

Loki's mouth opened in shock.

"Yeah, that's right. I know your big bad secret and I don't care. So why should you care about my race?" Darcy asked. "It's only complicated because you're making it that way."

"I do not wish to be in Thor's shadow any longer." Loki looked upset, shaking off Darcy's touch and dropping his head to stare at his hands.

Darcy scoffed, "Hold up, let me get this straight. You won't let yourself act on whatever this is between us because Thor went there first with Jane? Laaaame."

"Do not question my reasoning. I have lived centuries as Thor's _brother_" Loki practically spat the word,_ "_before you were even a speck within your mother's womb. You know nothing of my life."

All this talk of Thor was starting to make Loki a bit testy and Darcy was going to need at least two more cups of coffee in her system if they were going to tackle the whole 'Odinson family issues' topic right now. She opted for changing the subject, voicing a question she'd been dying to ask ever since Thor had told her and Jane about Loki's heritage. "Hey, um...now that the whole frosty thing is out in the open, can I see?"

Startled, Loki looked up to stare at her. "You wish to see my true form?" He asked, appearing genuinely shocked by her request.

Darcy nodded emphatically, "Yeah, it sounds awesome."

The corners of Loki's mouth pulled down into a contemplative frown, "I do not know if I am able to reveal my true self due to the limitations on my magic." He touched the charmed chain that hung around his neck.

"Oh, yeah." Darcy's shoulders slumped in disappointment. "Could you try at least? Or is that necklace like a shock collar that'll zap you if you do something you shouldn't?"

"I believe the charm was put in place by my mother. Despite all that I have done, she would not wish any harm upon me." Loki answered quietly.

"Unconditional love, that's what moms do best." Darcy smiled. "Man, I hope we get Jane's Einstein-Rosen thingie built soon. I'd love to meet your mom. From what I've heard, she sounds like a total badass."

"A bad ass?" Loki looked confused.

"It's a compliment," Darcy explained, "I'll explain later. Right now, I want to see your frosty side!"

Loki sighed as if Darcy's request were a huge inconvenience. "Fine. Back up." He ordered, standing and moving away from the desk.

Darcy stood and pushed her chair away, taking two steps back as Loki had instructed.

"Just...do not touch me unless I say you can." Loki warned, "Jotun skin is extremely cold. It will burn clear through your flesh unless I use my magic to keep the ice at bay."

"Got it." A shiver of nervous excitement ran down Darcy's spine.

Loki straightened his back and closed his eyes. Darcy waited, taking the opportunity to study him without his knowledge. He was tall and lean, built completely of sharp angles. In fact, he looked a bit too thin. There were also dark circles under his eyes that made Darcy's chest tighten with worry. Was he sleeping well? How did S.H.I.E.L.D. treat him when she and Jane weren't around to see? ...and when had she started caring so much?

Darcy was brought out of thought when she saw a deep blue start to creep over Loki's normally pale skin. The blue continued to spread, leaving a swirling pattern of raised ridges in its wake. When Loki's skin had completely changed, he re-opened his eyes and Darcy was surprised to find two dark red orbs watching her carefully.

A small gasp of awe escaped Darcy's lips and she saw Loki shrink back, looking fearful and ashamed.

"Monstrous, is it not?" He muttered, dropping his gaze to the floor.

"No." Darcy said firmly. She approached him slowly, stopping when she was about a foot in front of him. "Tell me when I can touch you." She requested.

Loki spread his fingers and studied his hands for a moment as he worked to control the cold. "Now." He finally said, "I will still feel cool but I should not injure-_oof!"_

Whatever he was about to say was cut off as Darcy surged forward and threw her arms around him, catching him off guard. Her hand found the back of his neck as she pulled him down and kissed him soundly.

Kissing him was, if possible, even better than Darcy had imagined (and she had spent _a lot _of time imagining it). Though his mouth was cold against the heat of her lips, his reaction was anything but frigid.

Loki's hands found her hips, sliding around to move under her shirt until they were pressing against the small of her back.

"Ah," Darcy gasped at the cold contact and Loki took advantage of her open mouth to start doing some truly wicked things with his tongue.

Darcy's hands explored every exposed inch of Loki's skin that she could reach. As she tilted her head to the side, willingly allowing him to deepen their kiss, she slid her hand down the side of his neck, letting the pads of her fingers trace over the prominent raises of his skin.

Loki moaned deeply into her mouth and Darcy started tugging at his shirt impatiently. She needed more of him. Now.

Loki reached up to help her, popping open enough buttons to give Darcy a very nice view of the muscled expanse of his chest.

She reluctantly dragged her lips away from his, pulling in a few lungfulls of much needed air before she lowered her mouth to his chest, swiping her tongue across his skin. It was cool, just like the rest of him, and Darcy's tongue tingled pleasantly.

Loki hissed at the contact, tightening his hold on her hips and pulling Darcy closer until she was flush against his body. She could feel the solid length of him pressed against her lower belly. It felt inexplicably warm in contrast to the rest of his skin and a sharp pang of desire shot through Darcy.

She didn't care if Nick Fury himself walked through the door right now in nothing but his undies; she was going to have mind-blowing ice sex with a God right here on her work desk and nothing would stop her. Darcy reached for the fastener on Loki's pants but he grasped her wrist, stilling her progress.

"Darcy," his voice was hoarse, "you forget where we are."

"No, I just don't care." She replied, flexing her hips to rub against him. She wanted to hear him make that moaning sound again.

She was not disappointed when Loki's red eyes fluttered shut and he made a low hum of approval in his throat.

"Doctor Foster will be returning soon. We must stop." He stepped back, putting a small amount of distance between their bodies. His skin slowly returned to its usual light complexion.

Darcy eyed him appreciatively. His shirt was still partially open, exposing the long, pale length of his throat while his pupils were dilated wide and glittering with lingering desire.

"Fine..." Darcy pouted, not even bothering to hide her disappointment. She straightened her shirt and smoothed down her hair, trying to hide some of the evidence of their heavy make-out session. "But we are totally doing that again."

Loki grinned slyly, reaching out to run a single finger down Darcy's arm, "I assure you, Miss Lewis, I am far from being done with you."


	4. Chapter 4

For those who are patiently waiting for that kneeling scene, fear not: it's coming up in the next chapter. Things will also get distinctly more M-rated at that time :)

* * *

Thursday

Darcy practically bounded out of bed on Thursday morning, eager to get on with the day. After lying awake for most of the night brimming with sexual frustration, she had finally drifted off into a light sleep only to be tortured by dreams of exotic blue skin and wandering hands. When she woke, she was feeling unrested and irritable thanks to the lingering sense of arousal that throbbed dully between her legs.

A nice hot shower improved her mood slightly. As Darcy padded back into her bedroom, she reached for her glasses on the nightstand only to find that they weren't there. Frowning, she crouched down and ran her hand along the carpet, thinking that they must have fallen onto the floor.

"Ugh, for God's sake." She adjusted the towel she wore (the last thing she needed was carpet burn on the girls) before dropping down onto her belly and scooting forward to peer underneath the bed.

"The fuck did they go?" She muttered, growing more annoyed by the second.

After spending half an hour tearing her bedroom apart, Darcy stood in the centre of the mess, biting her lip and considering her options. She was fresh out of contact lenses and she needed to leave for work within the next ten minutes.

With a resigned sigh, she retrieved her purse from the hall closet and rooted around for the small protective case that held her prescription sunglasses.

Better than nothing, she supposed.

- A -

The lighting in S.H.I.E.L.D.'s facility sucked. Darcy found this out the hard way when she smashed her hip right into the corner of her desk upon entering the lab.

"Ow! Dammit, stupid desk. That fucking hurts!" Darcy touched her tender hip, wincing slightly. Yep, that would be leaving one hell of an impressive bruise.

"Good morning Miss Lewis. Still as vulgar as ever, I see." Loki looked up from his work with mild amusement.

"Fuckin' A. Today it's totally not my fault though, it's this stupid death trap." Darcy narrowed her eyes at the desk, "I should drag you outside and burn you, you useless hunk of wood."

"Instead of threatening inanimate objects, perhaps you could simply remove those dark eyeglasses you wear?" Loki suggested with an oh-so-innocent smile.

"Not happening, cowboy." Darcy sighed and collapsed into her chair, making a face when the movement caused the pain in her hip to flare up. "I lost my glasses. This is my only other pair and I'm blind as a bat without them."

"How lovely." Loki stated dryly before lowering his head and returning to his paperwork.

Darcy watched him silently, using her sunglasses to her advantage by staring at him for longer than she would normally dare to. He seemed completely at ease, like yesterday's hot 'n frosty make-out session hadn't even happened. That unflappable arse.

Darcy booted up her computer and started inputting Jane's latest data. She soon grew bored and started humming to herself. After two more pages of data entry, she started singing out loud.

"I wear my sunglasses indoors, so I can, so I can do work. Na-na na-na na-na..."

"What in Valhalla's name are you doing?" Loki interrupted, looking at Darcy as if she had just grown a second head.

"Singing." Darcy stated simply, "You've been on Earth for a while now. Haven't you ever heard that song, I Wear My Sunglasses At Night?"

Loki shook his head, a bewildered look on his face, "Your mind works in strange ways, Darcy Lewis."

"You betcha." Darcy grinned, returning her attention to the computer.

Out of the corner or her eye, she caught Loki roll his eyes at her. Seeing such a very human gesture come from him was surprising. The shock must have shown on her face because Loki was now looking right at her.

"Do tell, what is so interesting about my face that you feel the need to stare?" He asked in a bored tone, easily flipping his pen between his long, nimble fingers.

Darcy watched the movement, momentarily lost in the smooth and sure motions of his hand. When she finally opened her mouth to respond, she had to clear her throat before the words would come out normally, "First of all, there isn't enough time in the day for me to even _start_ on your face." Ha. Let him decide whether that was a compliment or an insult. "Secondly, you totally just rolled your eyes at me. How very human of you, Mr. High and Mighty Space Prince. Looks like us Midgardians are starting to rub off on you, eh?"

Loki scoffed. Darcy saw his eyes flick up to the ceiling, as if he was just barely restraining himself from rolling his eyes again.

"That is not solely a Midgardian custom." Loki said shortly, "It does exist in other realms as well."

"If you say so." Darcy said, trying to hide her grin. She had clearly struck a nerve and was eager to see how this played out.

"I do say so." Loki scowled at her, his grip on the pen tightening until his knuckles turned white.

"No, no. I totally believe you." Darcy put her hands up in a motion of surrender, biting on her lower lip to control her desire to laugh.

"Midgard is not rubbing off on me. You think I could be influenced by such a weak and simple-minded race?" He spoke heatedly, growing louder and more animated with each word. Darcy was starting to worry that she's unintentionally triggered those old super-villain tendencies of his. Oopsie.

"Do you not know who I am?" He declared loudly, standing and kicking his chair out of the way. "I am Loki of-" he stopped suddenly, his jaw tightening with an emotion Darcy couldn't identify. Anger? Grief?

"Of what?" The question was out of Darcy's mouth before she could stop herself. Glancing to her side she saw that Jane had dropped her work and was watching her and Loki with interest.

Loki's shoulders slumped with defeat as his gaze dropped down to the floor. "I don't know anymore." He muttered.

He slowly retrieved his chair from where he'd kicked it up against the wall, pulling it back to his desk. He reminded Darcy of a kid who'd just been scolded in class as he sat back down and stared at his work glumly.

Jane hurried over to her and whispered in Darcy's ear, "What did you _do_ to him?"

"I don't know!" Darcy exclaimed, "...Okay, in hindsight I probably shouldn't have said that he's starting to act like us, seeing as how he kind of thinks us mortals are lower than low. Like, underneath dirt. Like, so low-"

"Yeah, I think I got it Darce." Jane exhaled loudly and shot a nervous glance at the God, "Just...be careful what you say to him. I know he's got that charm on him but still..." the rest of Jane's sentence trailed off but Darcy knew what she was getting at. He was still a murderous psychopath, reformed or not.

Darcy chewed her lip, her eyes following the same path as Jane's until they landed on Loki. "Yeah," she said softly, "I know."

The rest of the morning continued on awkwardly with the three lab occupants working separately and barely speaking. Darcy made her way through a large chunk of Jane's notes before her concentration was broken by the sound of her grumbling stomach.

"Snack break!" Darcy called out, deciding that she'd had enough of the whole awkward silence thing. She had no problem being the one to break the ice and get rid of all the uneasy tension in the room. After all, Darcy was used to being the _cause_ of awkward silences. Her sharp humor was so unappreciated, especially in a stuffy place like S.H.I.E.L.D. "Jane, did you eat breakfast? Don't make me go all 'concerned mom' on you."

Jane looked up from her equipment, wincing apologetically, "Um, no I didn't really have time. Can you grab me a bagel?"

"You got it. And you-" Darcy turned her attention to Loki, "I'm not even gonna ask. If I have to listen to you complain one more time about how our food is too lowly for your sophisticated space prince palate, I'm going to hold you down and force feed you the biggest, greasiest cheeseburger I can find."

Loki looked shocked and disgusted by her threat, but wisely kept his mouth shut.

"Good." Darcy grabbed her S.H.I.E.L.D. ID off the desk and hooked it on her pants before heading out of the lab towards the cafeteria.

The trip was short and thankfully uneventful (she _really_ didn't need a second coffee-down-the-shirt incident this week). Darcy returned to the lab with two paper baggies: one holding Jane's bagel and the second containing a chocolate glazed donut for herself. She sooooo deserved a treat.

After passing Jane her food, Darcy settled into her desk, alternating between typing and taking bites of her sugary snack.

"Hey Darce, do you have a copy of Monday's frequency readings?" Jane was rifling through a messy stack of papers and looking rather frazzled.

"Sure thing." Darcy located the proper files and printed out a copy of the readings. She walked them over to Jane's desk while absently munching on her donut.

Jane's face relaxed into a grateful smile as she accepted the papers from Darcy's outstretched hand. "Um, they're a bit sticky, but thanks." Jane wiped her hand on the leg of her jeans.

Darcy raised her half-eaten donut, waving it a little. "Just a bit of frosting."

"The donut couldn't have waited on your desk?" Jane asked.

"Not a chance," Darcy responded, "Precious, sweet yumminess like this can't be left unattended." She took another bite, humming with contentment as the sugar hit her tongue.

"Well, I'll leave you two alone then." Jane flashed Darcy a smile before her attention returned to the papers she held.

Darcy turned to head back towards her desk but instead found herself smashing face-first into something solid. Or, rather, _someone _solid.

Looking up, she saw Loki staring down at her with a dark, disapproving look on his face.

"Aw, dude! My donut!" Her precious chocolatey treat was now just a mess of dough smushed into the front of Loki's shirt.

"Honestly, less co-ordinated than a blind bilgesnipe." Loki muttered to himself, brushing the crumbling pastry off his shirt with a look of utter distain.

"A biggle-whatsit?" Darcy asked, screwing up her forehead in a look of confusion.

Loki sighed, "I am attempting to insult your clumsiness but apparently my vocabulary is far too extensive for your tiny, simple, mortal mind. In the future I shall try to...what is the Midgardian phrase...'dumb it down' for you."

"Ooooooh..." Darcy shoved her sunglasses up onto her forehead, fixing him with a hard glare despite the fact that he looked totally fuzzy to her bare eyes, "You did _not _just say that."

"I believe I did." Loki raised his eyebrows challengingly.

"You want to talk about dumbing it down? Let's see," Darcy said, putting a finger to her chin thoughtfully, "I seem to recall a time when Jane had to teach you what a pizza was. And then there was the day you practically fell off your chair when my phone chimed with a text message. Oh! And the toaster incident-"

"Enough." Loki hissed, "I believe you have proven your point. Also, you swore to never speak of the toaster incident." He added with a petulant look.

"Will you two just make up and get back to work already?" Jane spoke up, startling both Darcy and Loki out of their heated staring match. "You've been snippy with each other all day. Come on guys." She pleaded.

"Alright" Darcy huffed and looked away, "you heard the boss lady." She straightened her spine and extended her hand to Loki, "Loki, I apologize." she said formally.

Loki eyed her warily before slowly grasping her hand and giving it a firm, quick shake. "I too apologize." He added quietly.

"Yay, now we're lab buddies again!" Darcy grinned and slipped her sunglasses back onto her face so she could see him clearly.

"Buddies?" Loki spoke the foreign word slowly, "You consider me your friend?" He looked adorably perplexed and Darcy felt her stomach flutter in response.

"Well yeah, of course." Darcy replied in what she hoped was a nonchalant voice, "I mean, if you weren't around who would I talk to? Jane's micro-electron reader?" She joked with a false laugh.

"Right." Loki suddenly seemed very interested in studying his feet. "As Doctor Foster said, back to work." He almost sounded...disappointed? Damn, Darcy had most definitely said the wrong thing.

"Ah, yeah." Darcy responded awkwardly, feeling her face heat with embarrassment, "We should get back to that. Plenty of sciencing to be done."

"Darcy?" Loki looked up from the floor and fixed his vibrant eyes on her, pinning Darcy in place.

"Yes?" Her voice came out much smaller and breathier than she'd intended.

"I cannot leave. You are still holding my hand."

Darcy looked down and realized that he was right; her hand was still gripping his fingers. She let go quickly as if she'd been burned. "Haha, my bad. There ya go!"

"Thank you," Loki muttered quietly. He went back to his usual corner of the lab, opened a hefty textbook and promptly began to ignore her. He didn't even seem concerned about the mess on his shirt anymore.

"Fuckballs," Darcy spoke under her breath, "Way to go, Lewis."

She went back to work but her attention span just wasn't there. Every few minutes she was glancing up at Loki, frowning when he continued to just sit there, slouching in his chair with his nose buried in that book.

At two o'clock, Jane gathered up her things and headed out the door to pick up some needed supplies from Stark's R&D department.

"Please try not to kill each other while I'm gone, or destroy the lab." She had begged Darcy before she left.

Darcy had sworn that they'd be fine, but with Loki's volatile mood she worried that she'd made an impossible promise.

Without the sound of Jane tinkering with equipment, and her habit of talking out loud to herself as she worked, the lab fell into uncomfortable silence for the second time that day. Darcy almost expected to hear crickets chirping.

She shifted in her chair. The absolute quiet was starting to make her feel antsy. With a resigned huff, she finally pushed herself out of her seat and made her way across the room to where Loki sat. She knew how to fix this but getting the words out without Loki biting her head off would be the hard part.

"Hey." Her voice sounded exceptionally loud in the otherwise silent room.

A full five seconds passed (Darcy counted each one painstakingly) before Loki raised his head to look at her, almost as if he wouldn't give her the satisfaction of responding right away.

"What is it, Miss Lewis? I'm quite busy." Normally when he called her 'Miss Lewis' it had a teasing ring to it but now it just sounded flat. A simple statement of her name instead of a promise of mischief and mirth. Darcy didn't like this version of 'Miss Lewis' much at all.

Sucking in a big breath, she gathered her courage and looked him in the eyes, "I'm sorry."

"Sorry? You already apologized earlier. It's fine." It was not fine. Darcy could hear it in his voice.

Loki lifted his book again, breaking their eye contact.

"No," Darcy said, placing her palm down flat on the page of his book so he was forced to pay attention to her, "I'm not talking about _that_ apology. I'm talking about what I said afterwards...it came out wrong. I'm your friend because I chose to be, not because you're the only option."

Loki scoffed, gesturing to the empty lab with a sweeping motion of his arm, "Look around you, Miss Lewis. Do you _see_ any other options?"

"That doesn't matter," Darcy snapped impatiently, "I like you because you're clever and charming, and you drive me completely insane sometimes, but I like that you challenge me, and you're damn sexy..." she trailed off when Loki stood and advanced on her, backing her up against Jane's desk. His eyes were dark and burning and he looked every bit the dangerous, powerful god Darcy had seen on TV nearly a year ago while New York was crumbling in the backdrop.

"Do not lie to me," he warned darkly, "If circumstances were different, if you were not trapped in this laboratory with me every day for the last eight months, can you honestly say that you would be my _friend_? Or would you look upon me with the same mixture of fright and disgust that I see on the faces of my S.H.I.E.L.D. handlers?" He finished with a sneer.

Darcy licked her lips, considering his question. "I don't know." She answered honestly. "But this is the way things are. Why waste my time thinking about what if's?"

Her response seemed to extinguish the fire in his eyes. His rigid shoulders relaxed and he suddenly looked very, very tired. "You are a most unusual mortal." Loki murmured, inclining his head so that his nose brushed against Darcy's.

"And you're totally bi-polar." Darcy responded, entranced by his dark, unblinking eyes.

She wasn't sure who moved first, but in the next instant they were a mess of lips and teeth and tongues. Loki's kiss was desperate and bruising, as if he were using Darcy as a lifeline anchoring the stormy mess that was his mind. Her fingers threaded through his hair, holding him in place as she kissed him back eagerly.

Far too soon, Loki pulled away. Darcy made a sound of protest, fisting her hands in his shirt to keep him from retreating any further.

"Darcy," Loki chastised half-heartedly, "We really mustn't do this."

"Why not? Don't you think we should be taking advantage of this alone time before Jane gets back?" Darcy leaned into him and felt him suck in a quick breath at the contact. Good. She was tired of him cutting things short. She wanted more, dammit.

To her delight, Loki's resolve crumbled. His arms wound around Darcy's waist before his hands dipped down low, grabbing her butt and pulling her flush against him.

"So I guess that answers the question of ass man or boob man, huh?" She gasped, feeling her entire body flush with warmth.

"Darcy?" Loki's voice was a low growl in her ear.

"Hmm?" She answered distractedly, more interested in studying the feeling of the not-so-little Loki Jr. that was currently pressing against her thigh.

"Do shut up."

She stretched up onto her toes and whispered into his ear. "Make me."

Loki's lips crashed down onto hers as he happily obliged. All too soon, he pulled his head back again.

"Dude," Darcy whined, "Come on."

Loki chuckled lowly, "So impatient. I simply wanted to do this." He reached up and removed Darcy's sunglasses, tossing them onto the desk behind her, "The corner of those infernal things nearly took my eye out."

"Well, that would be fitting," Darcy commented, leaning in to scrape her teeth against the sensitive skin underneath his jaw and drawing a low hum of pleasure out of Loki, "blinding you during a make-out session. That's just the kind of week it's been."


	5. Chapter 5

This is my first time writing real smut so I'd appreciate your thoughts on it. I'm not quite ready to give up these characters yet so there will be a short chapter 6 even though I originally planned to stop here :)

* * *

Friday

On Friday morning, Darcy heaved a great sigh of relief. Her shit-tastic week was nearly over and she had even found her lost glasses wedged between the cushions of her couch (how in the hell they got there, she'd never know).

On her walk to the lab, the sun was shining and the air was warm and spring-like. It was shaping up to be a good day...almost _too_ good of a day. Some disaster just had to be waiting for her once she got to work.

After flashing her S.H.I.E.L.D. badge to the guard on duty and taking the elevator down to the lab, Darcy poked her head through the doorway, bracing herself and expecting to see the worst. Fire, a flood, Loki cackling evilly while Jane was tied up in the corner...okay, maybe that one was a bit of a stretch.

She frowned slightly when all appeared to be normal. Well, normal except for the fact that Jane was nowhere to be seen.

"Hey, you." She addressed Loki as she walked into the room, dropping her purse on her desk. She used the simple greeting to gauge where he fell on her scale of 'how crazy is Loki today?': zero being when he was in full-on boring science mode with Jane, and ten being stark raving bonkers. Yesterday was the closest she'd ever seen him come to reaching the bonkers level. That little performance was a solid eight or nine in her books.

"Hello." Loki replied, barely glancing up from the papers spread out in front of him.

Yep, he was a zero today. Darcy was a little disappointed, she liked him best when he was around a four or a five: flirtatious and a bit mischievous without causing any real harm.

"Whatcha working on?" Darcy wandered over to him and peeked over his shoulder, studying the complex equations.

"Doctor Foster was called away to a meeting and she asked that I complete these for her." Loki added a new line of equations to the page, a long jumble of letters and numbers that all looked like gibberish to Darcy.

"Ick." Darcy made a face.

"You dislike mathematics?" Loki asked, dropping his pen and leaning back in his chair so his full attention was on Darcy.

"Yeah, really not my fave." Darcy replied. She moved away from him, intending to go back to her desk, but Loki's hand caught her arm.

"Come," he moved over, making room at the desk for Darcy to sit next to him, "It's really not complicated."

Darcy stared at him, blinking a few times to make sure that what she was seeing was right, "You want to give me a math lesson?"

"I will only offer once." His lip quirked up into a half-smile and Darcy was done for. That damn smile would make her agree to anything.

She pulled up a chair, focusing intently on the God beside her. He explained things patiently and animatedly, like he was eager to teach her. It made Darcy take back what she said about his science side being boring. It was _hot_. Maybe if her old high school math teachers had such rich, captivating voices, she wouldn't have failed their classes so badly.

Darcy slid closer to him, making it look like she wanted a better view of the page when she really just wanted to touch him. Her shoulder pressed against his and she heard his voice falter for a second before he continued.

"You see, the numbers are the variables so in this instance, we are solving for _n_." Loki's voice had taken on a deeper tone now as he went on with his explanation.

Darcy nodded, surprised by the fact that what he was saying was actually making sense to her.

"Here," Loki handed her a pen, "you solve the next one."

"Are you kidding me?" Darcy raised her eyebrows, shooting him a skeptical look.

"Go on, try it." Loki urged, sliding the paper and a calculator in front of her.

Darcy bit her lip and stared down at the equation. She slowly began working it out, step by step, as he had shown her. After a few minutes she slid the paper back across the desk to Loki, showing him her answer. As his eyes scanned the page, Darcy tensed and prepared herself for the oncoming disappointment.

Loki set the paper down and smiled at her widely, "Well done, Darcy."

"What?" Darcy's mouth dropped open with surprise, "I did it? Oh my god, I did it!" She bounced in her seat, "Look out world, Darcy Lewis is now a mathematical genius!"

"A frightening prospect." Loki said wryly.

Darcy gave him a good punch in the arm for his comment, making Loki chuckle.

"Honestly," she said, looking up at him with a smile, "thanks. I never thought I could do that kind of stuff."

Loki angled his body closer to her, their shoulders still touching. His face grew serious and when he spoke, his voice was strong with conviction. "You are a storm encased inside a mortal body. You are capable of much more than you could ever believe, Darcy. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise."

Darcy had no idea how to respond to that, so she didn't. Instead, she showed her appreciation by cupping his face and kissing him soundly.

"Thank you," she said again once she pulled away, "you know, if the whole space prince thing doesn't work out, you could have a very promising career as a motivational speaker."

"How would I go about doing that," Loki asked, wrapping a curly strand of her hair around his finger, "when you are the only Midgardian I find worthy of my time?"

"Um, yeah, now that I think about it, probably best not to put you on a stage in front of a crowd full of mortals anyway. We all know how that panned out for you last time." Darcy leaned into him as he continued to play with her hair.

"Not my finest moment." Loki admitted, frowning at the memory of that evening in Germany. "Speaking of which, there is something I would like you to do for me."

"Hmm? What's that?" Darcy asked, her eyes half-closed. His hand was currently massaging the back of her neck and it felt _amazing_.

"I would like to collect on our bargain now." He leaned forward, whispering into her ear, "Kneel for me, Darcy."

Oh boy.

"Here? Now? In the lab?" Darcy squeaked, sitting upright and shaking off Loki's hand. Damn, she really hoped that he had forgotten about their little wager, but she should have known better than to think that someone as cunning as Loki would ever forget about a debt owed to him.

"I'm waiting." Loki pushed himself out of his chair, standing tall in front of her and raising an eyebrow expectantly.

Darcy stood as well, the top of her head just barely meeting his chin. She tried not to visibly shiver at the feeling of power and authority he was giving off. It was strangely turning her on.

"Fine, let's get this over with." She tried to inject as much boredom into her voice as possible. No big deal, she knelt before incredibly attractive gods all the time. _Not_.

Reluctantly, Darcy dropped down onto her knees. Her mind was chanting _don't look up, don't look up, don't look up_ as she fixed her eyes on Loki's shoes. One minute of kneeling, that was all he was getting. She started to count off the seconds in her head.

"Ah, now this is a truly lovely sight." Loki's voice was so smug and satisfied that it took every ounce of Darcy's willpower not to raise her fist and punch him in the balls. "Is this not better?" He questioned gently, almost kindly, "Is this not your natural state?"

A hot spark of anger ignited in Darcy's stomach and before she could stop herself, she glared up at him, "Fuck no. This is _not _my...natural...oh."

She really should not have looked up. From her position on the floor, all six-plus feet of Mr. Tall, Dark, and Godly was staring down at her with a hungry, carnal look that made Darcy's stomach pool with heat of a completely different kind.

Their eyes met and they stared at each other in silence, Loki towering over her and Darcy on her knees, head tilted back so far that her hair almost brushed the floor.

"Darcy," Loki's voice cracked part way through her name. He wet his lips before he spoke again, "Stand up, now."

Darcy moved slowly and shakily, her legs refusing to cooperate. A side effect of the thorough eye-fuck Loki had just given her, she supposed. Before she could get back on her feet, Loki had dropped down onto his knees in front of her.

A shocked gasp escaped her lips, "You-"

She was cut off by the feeling of Loki's mouth pressing against hers urgently.

Darcy moaned, feeling herself melt against him until she was practically sitting in his lap.

"I am so tired," He spoke between kisses, "of trying to resist you." His hands roamed over her back and through her hair.

"About time you came to your senses." Darcy replied with a quick grin as her overly eager fingers began to fumble with the buttons on his shirt.

Loki's mouth found hers again, stealing her breath away and making her completely forget about his still-buttoned shirt, the surrounding lab, and everything else.

It was the feeling of something cold and hard against her back that finally caught Darcy's attention, as she realized that Loki had lowered her down onto the tile floor. He was stretched out over top of her, every inch of him pressed against her, and Darcy's legs had somehow found their way around his hips.

They were one step away from dry humping like horny teenagers. On the floor. In the middle of Jane's lab. Darcy was simultaneously excited and horrified.

She pushed on Loki's shoulders, making him sit up so she could wiggle out from under him.

Loki sat back on his heels, watching her carefully. His cheeks were flushed and he looked ashamed. "Darcy, forgive me. I shouldn't have-"

"Your room." Darcy interrupted, "Where is it? Cause as much as I want to have kinky lab sex with you, it seems like the kind of thing that could get a girl fired."

Loki looked momentarily stunned. "You...you still want to...?" He sounded so unsure of himself, all traces of his earlier cocky self-assurance gone.

"Abso-_fucking_-lutely." Darcy grabbed his arm, trying to tug him up off the floor. "I've been waiting for this for a long time, buddy. Now get your ass in gear!"

Loki jumped up, planting a quick, hard kiss on Darcy's lips. When he pulled back, his eyes were bright. "I will have to sneak you past the guards but that's nothing a little mischief and deception can't take care of." He flashed her a smile overflowing with charm and deviousness.

Darcy had never seen this happy and playful side of him before. In fact, it was making her feel pretty giddy herself as the two of them ran down hallways of S.H.I.E.L.D., ducking into alcoves and empty rooms to avoid being seen by patrolling security.

Every time a guard passed by their hiding place, Darcy would start to snicker and Loki would attempt to silence her before giving up and instead kissing her senseless.

By the time they reached Loki's living quarters on the 37th floor, Darcy was breathless and incredibly aroused.

Loki pulled a plastic card out of his pocket and swiped it through the reader attached to the door. The little light blinked from red to green as the door unlocked and Loki pulled Darcy inside the room.

"Swanky digs." Darcy commented, taking in the bright, modern kitchen and open concept living room.

"I do hope you aren't expecting a full tour right now." Loki reached for her, sliding his arms around her waist.

"Nope. Just show me the bedroom and I'll be a happy camper." Darcy grinned, letting out a short shriek of surprise when Loki easily lifted her over his shoulder and carried her into his bedroom, dropping her onto the mattress.

Darcy's hands slid over the soft, expensive bedding, thinking that she should totally get herself locked up on S.H.I.E.L.D. house arrest. This place was nicer than her own apartment.

She looked up at Loki, a shiver of anticipation running through her as she watched him stand at the foot of the bed. "Soooo...?" She asked when he continued not to move.

"Just a moment," Loki's voice was deep and velvety, "I want to remember this, seeing you spread across my bed." His eyes roamed over her greedily, causing goosebumps to break out over Darcy's skin.

"Loki..." She didn't care if she sounded whiny, she needed him _now_.

He relented, crawling onto the bed until his body hovered over hers with his weight supported on his forearms.

Darcy looked up at him, wide eyed and already breathing heavily. "I have a request," she said, "...will you go blue for me?"

"Hmm?" Loki's fingers trailed up her side, making Darcy squirm.

"Blue. You know, your Yo-Yo form? Pleeeeease?" She asked, batting her eyelashes innocently.

"Jotun." Loki corrected automatically as he studied her with a curious look, "Really?"

"Really really." Darcy nodded, biting her lip with excitement. "It's super hot. Not that you aren't normally super hot. Cause you are. Hey, is that irony? Being super hot when you're a frost-"

"Darcy." Loki cut her off by pressing a finger to her lips. "Enough."

A look of concentration passed over his face before deep blue began to crawl over his skin. "Is this what you want?" He asked, his striking red eyes fixing on her.

"Fuck, yes." Darcy put a hand around the back of his neck, pulling him down and kissing him hard. Her lips tingled from the cold and she felt a bolt of pure desire shoot through her.

Her hands tugged at his shirt, pulling it out from where it was tucked into his pants. Loki helped her unbutton it; her hands were too shaky and impatient to do it properly. Finally, the shirt slid off his shoulders and he tossed it into the corner of the room. Darcy quickly sat up and yanked her own shirt over her head. She could hear Loki's quick intake of breath as she settled back down on the mattress in only her bra and jeans.

He moved over her, his body covering hers as the cool expanse of his chest pressed against her warm softness of hers. She tilted her head, attaching her lips to his neck and sucking on the dark blue skin while her hands explored the markings on his body.

"Darcy," Loki panted, "you are testing the limits of my willpower. I cannot hold this form any longer, for fear of hurting you." The coloring of his skin began to fade, slowly smoothing out into the familiar paleness of his Asgardian form.

Disappointment must have shown on her face because Loki kissed her cheek tenderly, "Next time, my dear." He promised.

Darcy's mood quickly brightened and she grinned at him widely.

"What?" Loki studied her face with a look of confusion.

Darcy's smile stretched even wider, almost hurting her cheeks. "You said next time."

"Yes, of course." Loki said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, "As I told you before, I am far from being finished with you."

"Good." Darcy arched her back, pressing herself against him suggestively and eliciting a low growl of desire from Loki.

He quickly relieved her of her jeans and then pushed down his own pants, letting out a string of curses as they got stuck around his ankle, making Darcy laugh.

Her laughter soon turned into sighs of pleasure as Loki's lips moved down her neck, exploring her chest. One of his hands slipped under her back, unclasping her simple black bra before he pulled the material away and dragged his tongue over the peak of her breast. A slightly embarrassing, strangled moan caught in the back of Darcy's throat.

Loki chuckled lowly and Darcy could feel his lips smiling against her skin, "Like that, do you?" He turned his attention to her other breast, repeating the motion with his tongue.

"God, yes." Darcy breathed, raking her nails down his back and making him shudder. When her hands reached his hips, she realized that he wasn't wearing underwear. She snaked her hand between their bodies and took him in her hand, squeezing gently.

Loki panted her name, his breath coming out in hot puffs across her skin. His hand caressed her thigh, moving upwards to her hip, where he hooked his fingers into the waistband of her panties and pulled them down. Darcy raised her hips and wiggled out of them, tossing them across the room carelessly.

There were no barriers between them now. Darcy could feel the heavy length of him resting between her legs and on instinct her knees spread wider, ready for him.

Loki caught her eyes, hesitating as if he was giving her one last chance to back out and say no. In response, Darcy stretched up and kissed him, pouring all her feelings (and a considerable amount of tongue) into it.

That seemed to be all the assurance Loki needed. He sunk into her slowly, causing them both to moan at the feeling. His rhythm was shallow and measured, slowly building Darcy's pleasure and allowing her time to get used to his substantial size.

When Darcy could take no more of the slow, teasing movements, she locked her legs around his hips, moving with him thrust for thrust and encouraging him to speed up.

Loki dropped his head, catching her lips in an intense kiss, "More, Darcy?" He questioned, his voice catching when she let her fingernails drag over the muscles of his back.

"Mmm-hmm." Darcy hummed, so focused on him that she didn't really care to form coherent words at the moment.

Loki's hips snapped forward, setting a new pace that was hard and urgent. Oh yes, this was what Darcy had been waiting for. She responded fervently, feeling a light sheen of sweat start to form over her skin as a ball of heavy, hot pressure formed low in her belly.

She rolled her hips against his, taking him at a new angle and making Loki shudder against her. He lowered his head, biting at the skin of her collarbone hard enough that Darcy would have a very evident hickey to hide afterwards.

When he raised his head, his pupils were large and black with desire. "Who do you belong to?" he demanded sharply, his possessive side showing as he rocked against her, "Tell me."

"You," Darcy gasped, threading her fingers through his dark hair and gripping it tightly. "Now tell me," her voice was so low and throaty that she hardly recognized it as her own, "Who do _you _belong to?"

Loki's hips faltered as he looked down at her with honest surprise. She had caught him off guard.

"I'm waiting..." Darcy purred in his ear, tilting her pelvis up to draw him completely inside her. She wasn't letting him off the hook that easily. If he wanted to claim ownership of her then she deserved the same from him.

Loki let out a choked gasp and buried his face against her neck. "You will be my undoing." He mumbled the admission against her skin before answering quietly. "I am yours Darcy." He seemed to regain his confidence then as he began thrusting hard and erratic. "I am yours and you are mine," he growled.

The words sent a shiver of pleasure through her body and it was all Darcy could do to gasp out a 'yes' as she clung to him, her body humming with pleasure as the aching between her legs grew to a nearly unbearable state.

Loki swiped his tongue along her neck, sucking hard on a particularly sensitive patch of skin below her ear. When he paired the action with a strong, deep thrust that made her breath hitch, it was Darcy's undoing.

Her fingernails dug into his back and her thighs instinctively tightened around his hips as she reached her peak with a sharp gasp, her mouth forming a small 'o' of pleasure.

"My Darcy," Loki moaned lowly, close to joining her with his own orgasm, "So beautiful when you come for me."

As she tried to catch her breath, Darcy stared at him, completely mesmerized by how handsome he was, especially when his face was free of its usual guarded expression. His forehead was relaxed and his eyes were half-lidded in a show of pure pleasure. He looked so much younger; boyish and innocent. An unexpected ball of emotion lodged in her throat.

With one final sporadic movement Loki cried out, spilling inside of her hotly and making Darcy moan out his name. She ran her hands up and down his back as he composed himself, panting against her shoulder. Finally, he rolled over and pulled Darcy with him so they lay on their sides facing each other, legs tangled together and Loki still buried inside her.

"I like you. Like, a scary, unhealthy amount." Darcy told him, pushing a piece of dark hair off his forehead and letting her fingers linger on his face, tracing his temple lightly.

Loki caught her fingers and brought them to his mouth for a kiss. "I am glad to hear it. I care for you as well, Darcy." He admitted, sounding almost shy.

Darcy beamed and leaned in, kissing him deeply before snuggling closer and resting her head under his chin. His heart beat steadily beneath her ear, lulling her into a peaceful, relaxed state.

"Jane is gonna be so pissed about this on Monday." She said, feeling quite content as she nestled closer to him.

"You think she will not approve?" Loki asked, his lips moving against her hair.

"Nah, she likes you. I'm talking about how handsy I'm going to get with you at work. It's going to totally embarrass her." Darcy replied, feeling Loki's chest rumble with laughter.

"Mmm. Then I shall look forward to Monday morning." He tightened his arms around her, stroking a hand down her bare back soothingly.

"It's gonna be a good week." Darcy agreed, tilting her head to place a chaste kiss on the underside of his jaw, "I think I'm due for one of those anyway."


	6. Chapter 6

A huge thank you to everyone who had read, reviewed and favorited Daily Disasters! This is just a short, silly bonus chapter based on "the toaster incident" Darcy mentions in chapter 4. I've got a new tasertricks fic in the works (with a more serious plot and a darker version of Loki) so you'll be seeing more from me shortly!

* * *

3 months later

"Come on, it won't bite."

"This is utterly ridiculous, Darcy."

"_Nooooo_, what's ridiculous is that you're a grown ass man-god who can't make his own damn toaster waffles!"

"But they taste so much better when you make them."

"Flattery isn't gonna get you out of this one, babe."

Darcy watched with amusement as Loki huffed and crossed his arms, carefully eyeing the stainless steel toaster that sat innocently on the counter before him.

"It's easy, just remember rule number one," Darcy held up her index finger, "do not, for the love of God, stick anything in there that isn't food...isn't _solid_ food." She amended.

"Yes, yes, I know _that_." Loki muttered grumpily.

Darcy snorted, "Yeah, only cause you tried to use it to heat leftover spaghetti and nearly burned down the whole S.H.I.E.L.D. facility."

"Need I remind you, yet again, about your promise to never speak of the toaster incident?" He shook his head ruefully, "What ever possessed me to tell you about that?"

"Must have been my dazzling good looks and buttload of charm." Darcy squeezed between the counter and Loki's body, briefly popping up on her toes to kiss the corner of his mouth. "Okay!" She turned to the toaster and clapped her hands together excitedly, "Waffle cooking 101 begins now!"

As Darcy ripped open the cardboard box she had retrieved from the freezer, she felt Loki's arm slide around her waist. His other hand brushed her hair away from the back of her neck and he started planting slow, soft kisses along her spine.

"Loki..." Darcy half-whined, half-moaned, "You're not paying attention."

"I can think of a far better use of our time right now." He drawled in her ear, nipping lightly at her skin.

Darcy sighed and allowed herself to lean back into his chest, "Keep your pants on. No sex till you learn how to use the toaster."

"This is cruel and unusual punishment." Loki buried his nose in her neck, his words muffled against her skin.

"No," she countered, "this is Darcy getting sick of making your breakfast every freaking morning."

Darcy had made the move out of her old apartment and in with Loki about a month ago, seeing no reason to keep paying rent when she spent most nights in Loki's bed anyway. And, she had to say, living with a sexy, mischievous God was pretty damn awesome...except when said God was being a total baby about using basic household appliances.

What had really surprised her was when Director Fury gave her the go-ahead to move in. Of course, it hadn't come without a fight. Darcy had endured hours of psych evaluations and lie detector tests to prove that she was acting of her own free will. Apparently, no matter how reformed Loki had become over the last year, S.H.I.E.L.D. still found it easier to believe that Darcy was being mind controlled/ blackmailed/otherwise threatened by Loki rather than the simple truth that she was kinda in love with the guy.

Though Jane was still a bit wary of him, she had slowly warmed up to the idea of their relationship once she saw how surprisingly affectionate and protective Loki was. In fact, Jane had even made a joke in the lab one morning, calling Darcy her sister-in-law and causing Loki to roll his eyes so hard Darcy thought they would pop right out of his head.

The memory still made Darcy smile. Returning to the task at hand, she ripped open the waffle package and pulled one out. Loki was still wrapped around her, his chin resting on her left shoulder. Darcy raised the frozen waffle and smacked him square in the face with it.

"Pay attention." She demanded.

Loki growled lowly, reminding her of a big, dangerous cat. "You will regret that, my dear."

"I'm sure I will," Darcy said nonchalantly, dropping the waffle into one of the toaster slots. "Okay, so this dial controls how dark you want it to toast...Loki? What are you doing?"

The God of Mischief's hand was currently working its way down the front of her pants.

"You told me to keep _my _pants on," he commented, grasping the waistband of her sweats and giving them a forceful tug, "you did not mention anything about your pants."

"Semantics," Darcy mumbled, her breath catching as she felt him push her panties aside and sink one long finger into her core.

Her body moved on instinct, pushing against him to grind against his crotch. She felt his chest rumble against her back as he made a low noise of approval. A second finger slipped inside her and Darcy began to pant.

"This isn't part of the lesson." She gasped, twisting her head to the side to capture his lips in a greedy kiss.

"Mmm," Loki hummed in agreement, breaking away from the kiss to grin at her roguishly, "but isn't this so much better?"

Darcy's legs felt like they were about to give out on her. Loki must have felt her trembling because his hand was suddenly gone from between her legs. In one quick motion he stripped off her underwear, spun her around, and set her up on the countertop.

Darcy's breath caught in her throat when she saw the way Loki was staring at her. She still couldn't believe the sheer amount of _need_ she saw on his face whenever he looked at her like that, but Darcy suspected that if she were to see herself right now, that same expression of desperate lust would be mirrored on her own face.

Loki stepped forward and Darcy automatically widened her legs, allowing him to stand between them. Even with her sitting on the countertop, there was a significant difference in height between them. Loki inclined his head until their foreheads were touching and their noses brushed. In the mid-morning light of the kitchen, his eyes were clear and blue. His stare set her blood on fire.

Darcy reached around his back and pulled at the hem of his grey t-shirt. Weekend Loki tended to wear a lot of thin, fitted shirts that clung to the muscles of his chest and shoulders. Darcy _really, really_ liked Weekend Loki.

She pulled the shirt up over his head, feeling her body flush with heat as she took in his bare, muscled torso. His frame had filled out a bit since she had moved in with him. Though he was still naturally thin, he didn't look nearly as sickly as he did when Thor had first brought him to S.H.I.E.L.D. Even if his diet was comprised of 85% toaster waffles, at least he was eating.

When Darcy first raided his kitchen and discovered that Loki's freezer was packed full of yellow Eggo boxes, she had laughed her ass off, thinking of Thor and his affinity for Pop-Tarts. It must run in the family, but she would never mention that to Loki. She doubted he'd appreciate the comparison to his brother.

"What are you thinking about?" Loki murmured against the skin of her shoulder as he moved the strap of her tank top aside to work on a hickey.

"Not Thor." Darcy responded automatically before her brain caught up with her mouth and she widened her eyes, realizing how bad that sounded.

Loki froze, looking up at her with a questioning raise of his eyebrow.

"So _that_ happened. Trust me, it totally came out wrong. Forget I said anything." She reached for him, looping her arms around his neck and pulling him close.

"Gladly." Loki responded, still looking a little perturbed by the mention of his brother while the two of them were half naked.

Darcy kissed him, raking her nails down his bare back and ridding him of any lingering concerns.

"Darcy," Loki's voice was hoarse when their mouths finally separated, "I need you." He bucked his hips lightly against her inner thigh, trying to relieve his arousal.

"But the toaster..." Darcy protested weakly.

"Fuck the toaster." Loki growled, pulling at Darcy's tank top.

"Really? Cause I thought you wanted to fuck me." Darcy quipped, mentally high-fiving herself for the spectacular comeback.

Loki wasn't quite so amused. "While I normally appreciate your quick tongue, you are trying the last of my patience right now." He warned in a low, sexy voice that made Darcy shiver with desire.

He continued to tug stubbornly on Darcy's top until she raised her arms and allowed him to pull it off. Immediately, Loki unclasped her bra and let it fall to the floor before cupping her breasts with his hands and squeezing firmly.

Darcy gasped at the unexpected movement, letting her head fall back and –

"Ow! Dammit!"

– smacking her skull against the row of cabinet doors behind her.

Loki's eyes went wide and Darcy could see him trying to hold back his laughter. Despite his efforts, a short, choked snort still managed to escape.

An honest-to-God _snort_.

Darcy was gonna kill him.

"Not funny, dude!" She complained, reaching up to feel the bump that was already forming on the back of her head.

"I believe it's quite funny, actually." Loki flashed her a wide grin. Darcy was tempted to smack it off his face, but then his thumb brushed over her nipple and all murderous thoughts flew out of her head.

She whimpered and tried to draw Loki closer to her, but he took a step back, shaking his head.

"Mind your head, my dear." He instructed gently.

"Mind my...oh," Darcy gasped, catching his meaning as she watched him bend over and part her thighs.

His warm breath hit her centre and Darcy went limp, carefully leaning her head back against the kitchen cabinets to avoid another painful incident. At the moment though, she couldn't really bring herself to care about pain or waffles or anything else for that matter.

All that existed in that moment was him and her, doing totally inappropriate things on their kitchen counter.

Best Saturday morning ever.

And besides, Darcy thought dazedly as Loki's tongue started moving between her legs, there was always tomorrow to teach him about the toaster.


End file.
